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I say, ?Hey baby?, I say, ?Hey, Janet
You are the one, you are the sun
And I'm your dutiful planet"

But she ain't down with any of that
'Cause she's heard that shit before
And I say, ?Oh yeah, you're right?
'Cause I see Betty X standing by the door

With more news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere
And it's getting strange in here
Yeah, it's getting stranger every year
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere, alright now

Now Betty X is like Betty Y minus that fatal chromosome
Her hair is like the wine dark sea in which sailors come home
I say, ?Hey baby?, I say, ?Hey, Betty X?
I lean close up to her throat

"This light you are carrying is like a lamp hanging from a distant boat"
"It is my light," says Betty, Betty X says, "This light ain't yours"
And so much wind blew through her words
That I went rolling down the hall

For more news from nowhere
More news from nowhere
And it's strange in here
Yeah, it gets stranger every year
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere

I turn another corner
I go down a corridor and I see this guy
He must be about one hundred foot tall
And he only has one eye

He asks me for my autograph
I write nobody and then
I wrap myself up in my woolly coat
And I blind him with my pen

'Cause someone must have stuck something in my drink
Every thing's getting strange looking
Half the people have turned into squealing pigs
The other half are cooking

Well, let me out of here I cried
And I went pushing past
And I saw Miss Polly singing with some girls
I cried, struck me to the mast

For more news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere
It's getting strange in here
And it gets stranger every year
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere

Well, then a black girl with no clothes on
She danced across the room
We charted the progress of the planets
Around that boogie woogie moon

I called her my Nubian princess
Gave her some sweet back fat ass jive
Spent the next seven years between her legs
A pining for my wife

But then by and by it all went wrong
I fell washed up on a shore
She stared down at me from up in the storm
And I sopped up on the floor

For more news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere
And don't it make you feel alone
Don't it make you wanna get right on home
More news from nowhere
More news from nowhere, let me hear it now

Well, here comes Elena with two black eyes
She's given herself a transfusion
She's filled herself with panda blood
To avoid all the confusion

I say, "The sun rises and falls with you
And various things about love"
But a rising violence in me cuts all my circuits off

Well, Elena she starts screaming
Her cheeks are full of psychotropic leaves
Her extinction was nearly absolute
When she turned her back on me

For more news from nowhere
I said, more news from nowhere
And it's getting strange in here
Yeah, it gets stranger every year
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere, alright, alright

I bump and crash into Deanna
Hanging pretty in the door frame
All the horrors that have befallen me
Well, Deanna is to blame

Every time I see you baby
You make me feel so unalone
And I wipe my face into her dress
Long after she'd gone home

With more news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere
And don't it make you feel alone
Yeah, and don't it make you wanna get right back home
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere, alright

And don't it make you feel so sad
Don't the blood rush to your feet
To think that everything you do today
Tomorrow is obsolete

Technology and women
And little children, too
Don't it make you feel blue
Don't it make you feel blue

For more news from nowhere
With more news from nowhere
Don't it make you feel alone
Yeah, and don't it make you wanna get right back home
More news from nowhere
Yeah, more news from nowhere, one last time

Well, I gotta say
Yeah, I gotta say
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye